The shopping experience

So I will readily confess that I am not a "fashionista". I leave that to my youngest daughter. I would leave it to my other daughters as well, but my oldest has four young children and it's difficult to color coordinate all the different substances and body fluids she comes in contact with every day with any designer line of clothing. And my middle daughter is too much like me and we just are not good shoppers. If you can't find it in 10 minutes and walk out of the store with it then it is just not worth the effort. While my daughters lived at home they at least kept me from embarrassing my self. Many times they would look at me cross-eyed and I knew to take a hint that the black and red plaid sweater didn't go with the brown tweed skirt. They later told me that brown tweed goes with nothing.  And since my son and husband say "it looks fine" with both eyes closed. I was forced to seek a professional intervention to prevent further poor decisions in the fashion department.
So Saturday March 16th found me at the South Towne Mall with a professional shopper named Alicia. She does a really good job and I highly recommend doing it.... if you like shopping. However, for me it was a form of torture that would have me spilling all my government secrets. The truth of the matter I'm not loving the 3 way view in any dressing room and is there some reason the lighting is always dim in there? It's not hiding anything. I learned all about the rise of a jean and leg length and how to avoid that gap in the back of your pants.

That being said, I had some success. This is what four hours of shopping looks like. Way beyond my ten minute limit.You'll notice no jeans. That's because just because someone (ie Alicia) tells you they fit, it doesn't mean you want to wear them home. Having to nearly dislocate my thumb while standing on one foot and sucking in my breath to button the jeans, is not my idea of a "fit". It doesn't matter that they will stretch out with wearing because in 20 minutes I will succumb to bad heart rhythms, the kind not conducive with life from holding my breath.
Yes, I've decided I like a fair amount of stretch in my denim. 20-30 % is good with me. They may not be as strong but I will be able to breathe. And any day I'm breathing, has to be better than one that I'm not.
I was blessed with a curvy shape. I've tried to celebrate and embrace my uniqueness. I've also tried to be modest in my attempts. My frustration with shopping is most people want me to flaunt my assets. So I had hoped to learn some valuable techniques to dress down my uniqueness. However, Alicia confessed that she was dressing me in an attempt to live vicariously. So there you have it. If you have curly hair you want to straighten it and if you have a slim figure you hope for curves. And sometime you make your peace with your body type and have a good day.