Thursday, May 26, 2011

Day 12; The "Miss"-adventures on the MALE deck....

All puns intended. In order to write the following post it is important to set the stage. First off, all the names have been changed to alias's although Buffy, Helen and Holly know who they are. As long as they continue to make payments I will continue to protect their identities.
   THe first thing you should know is that seriously every passageway on the ship resembles every other passageway. The only significant difference between the male deck and the female deck is that the female deck is one deck below the male deck, throughout the entire ship. THis will all make sense at the end of the post.
   Initially, it didn't seem fair that I had to climb up or down an extra flight of stairs to get to my berthing. (what we call our current sleeping arrangements) I actually wondered if it was an evil plot thought up by some MAN that thought all the extra stairclimbing would make us all look tighter in the jeans.

Why they included "female" in the description of their door may have been a freudian slip on their part? So Buffy gets off the stairwell on the wrong floor and enters the "male" deck. She is met by a man with a large sack blocking her way. He says "male deck" but what she hears is "mail deck" and she believes he is on the female deck delivering mail, even though that happens in the post office. She nods and tries to go around him, he blocks her advance and tells her more loudly this time, "Male Deck" she is still hearing impaired and only hears "Mail". THis happens 3 times before the light goes on over her head, she turns beat red and makes fast work of fleeing off the floor.
Holly not only entered the male deck but she happily did her recycling outside the bathroom stalls. I'm not kidding we sorted everything. Metal, paper, plastic. It was so stressful to determine where the empty "pringles" can went with it's metal bottom, paper sides and plastic lid that we usually unloaded them off the ship. SHe then merrily wanders down the hall to her berthing, only to open the door and see Carl sitting in her room. Ooops one of them is on the wrong deck. In case, that wasn't bad enough she passes someone she knows from church as she is fleeing. He's only wearing a towel.

AS you can see the doors all look alike. I mean really can't we paint them a different color? But I saved the best story for last. Helen was coming back from shore and she really really really needed to use the facilities. So she made a bee-line down the stairway, opened the door and wandered into the bathroom. She made quick work of relieving herself, washed her hands and exited into the passageway only to be shocked by bumping into a hairy chested man wearing nothing but a smile and a towel. SHe said, "one of us must be on the wrong deck." His only reply "yes, ma'am". It was then that she remembered being puzzeled by the urinals in the bathroom. She couldn't remember them being there before. Helen's biggest concern throughout the rest of our sea-faring journey was that she couldn't recognize the man with his clothes on so she could apologize. In comforting her I told her it was okay because he wouldn't recognize her either, but he would remember her blue shirt. At this point I should mention that we all wear blue shirts, we all look alike. That means it's just as likely that the hairy chested man thinks that I visited the male deck. So I asked Helen if she would quickly remove her blue shirt if she ever found herself on the male deck again. Yeah, I know that could probably backfire too. ;)

1 comment:

Georgia said...

Lisa, you certainly have a way with the stories or as my father-in-law used to say, "She can spin a yarn".

Loving the details of your adventure with you fun sense of humor mixed in!